Tinker Bell Economics

I was having an argument with someone online about economics. I argued that the economy is based on the "Tinker Bell" principle. When Tinker Bell is hurt, Peter Pan turns to the screen and says, "Everyone clap, and Tinker Bell will come back to life!" Everyone claps (supposedly) and she comes back to life. Everything is good.

I got this Tinker Bell economics idea from President George W. Bush. When the terrorists attacked, he was asked by the media, "What can people do?"

Go out and buy big appliances, he said. Keep on spending. That will keep the economy going.

This struck me as total madness. That's how we can make a difference? Buy maxing out our credit cards? Is this really how the world works?

Lately, on the radio, I've been hearing people saying the same thing. We're having hard economic times, reporters say. What can we, as individuals do, to fix it?

Go out and spend, the economists answer. Have faith in the economy. That will make it healthy again.

This kind of talk reminds me of "planned obsolescence". Back in the day, big corporations realized that if they built things that break quickly, consumers will have to buy more. They spoke about this concept in public. Seriously. It was no secret, even though it was insane. The makers of crap believed people would be overjoyed at the notion of items that break and having to buy new crap. Eventually they realized their error and took the concept underground.

The notion that the economy is fixed when they tell us all to buy crap -- will the eventually go underground too? Because it's inherently offensive.

It all seems insane to me. And because I am a temperamental type, I vented online in a forum. Economics is bullshit. This isn't a science. The economy is make-believe. It's all nonsense. Tinker Bell is a poor role model.

Someone of a stabler mind stepped forward to tell me I'm wrong. Economics is a real science. Obviously I had no idea what I was talking about. I am a mad man. Shut up, retard.

Well, maybe. I thought to myself. Maybe I am full of shit. So I did a search on "Tinker Bell" and "economics" on Google and found loads of webpages that critique modern economics in exactly the terms I use.

Have faith in the economy, and it will recover! Lose faith and it will collapse! Keep spending! Keep taking out loans to buy things. If you don't BUY, civilization will DIE.

The weirdest part is some economists aren't mocking the economy when they say this. No sir. They're merely describing the economy. It's all Tinker Bell. Now how can we work in this mass-hypnosis model of capitalism?

One writer speculated that people attacked the Bush administration, and this destroyed the economy. People were so eager to get him out of office, they were too harsh. This caused a lack of faith. And that's why the sky is falling.

This sort of thinking becomes very strange. If you genuinely believe in Tinker Bell Economics, you have to be very worried about what you say and do. Because if you tell someone the economy is bad, and they believe you, you could bring down the whole economy -- you could start a panic.

Is this why economists so often fail to speak English? If they're understood, they could cause chaos. An economist in Brazil is overheard complaining about the price of nuts, and the next thing you know the markets crash and the streets are red with blood.

So you have to be optimistic at all times. Fake it. The cheery smile on your face will keep everything stable and sane. This explains so much about North American politics and culture that I worry I have stumbled on some sort of secret. Feign happiness. Keep up a good front. Ignore problems.

Soon they will take me away -- to prevent me from bringing down the entire system.

If there are any sensible economists out there who understand these things, could they reassure me that money isn't make-believe?